WOMAN: The most efficient money reducing agent known to man-kind! |
Q: What does a blonde owl say?
A: What, what? |
The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action. |
What is the difference between a woman and a magnet?
Magnets have a positive side! |
Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?" |
Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards. |
What's the diff between a Rottwieler and a Poodle?
If Rotty starts humping your leg, let it finish. |
Boss: (to employee) - Experts say humor on the job relieves tension in this time of down-sizing, Knock, Knock.
Employee: Who's there?
Boss: Not you anymore. |
A 3-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and says: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw." |
I've used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead. |
